What is Fair?

Yesterday I explained what I asked the College to do to address a decade of confidentiality problems after my trust had already been breached when I first tried to report the sexual abuse and that was handled poorly.

In short, I asked the College to cover part of the medical advice related to PTSD and income loss, cover the expenses of the LONG ordeal, and pay a “community fine” to nonprofits and people in need of help so I could have at least  one  clear  way  of seeing accountability for the very unreasonable and years long delay.

Is that fair?  Is what I am seeking fair?  I get much of my advice from health care professionals.  We have shouting matches, because I say what they say is too much.   There’s no way I can make that happen, I explain.

So instead of taking medical advice on face value, I go back to zero and build from there, slowly considering the advice I got and sometimes modifying it to fit my life better.  A plan develops.  Then I think about “What if this is forever?  What am I missing?”   Then I usually hear about another confidentiality breach or another problem related to Jesuit crap, and my anger and annoyance strengthen my desire to get this right and I pay more attention.  Along the way and again when I am all done, I seek advice from people who know me.

The bottom line came from a medical professional who has known me a long time.   He said what I asked the College to do is fair.  “Why do you say so?”  I asked.   He replied, “Because they can do it.   You did not ask for more than they can do.   Because they can do it, they should do it.”

So at the end of this process,  that’s what I gave to Holy Cross for my proposal to resolve this — a plan.   And it’s fair.

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