“How Can I Be Sure?”

Sometimes when I pray, I sing, out loud or in my imagination.  And sometimes I am doing it before I recognize that I am.

A couple hours ago, I was singing in my mind,  “How can I be sure, in a world that’s constantly changing?  How can I be sure where I stand with you?”  I didn’t know I was singing and praying until my prayer had the answer.   Grandma.

Loads of academic recognition, loads of awards, genius IQ — taken out of class for special testing beginning when I was 5.  It means nothing and never really has.  There is only life and people and I am not special.  I don’t want to be.  With two older mentally disabled siblings who are super bright, I know these tests don’t mean much.

I cannot be the only person who prays in song.   The question to God:  “How can I be sure, in a world that’s constantly changing, where I stand with you?” And the answer is Grandma, and that makes a load of sense.

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